INVEST IN YOURSELF

Einstein once said the definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing and expecting different results every time.

Are u frustrated in your life, maybe you have a feeling that something is there which is not right and needs to be changed? And you keep waiting for the situation to get change, but it doesn't happen. Stress, anxiety or some kind of past regrets keep haunting you, and don't let you live a peaceful life. Have you tried something in past and still practicing it in a similar manner and expecting a different result every time and assuming that situation will change in the future but in reality, it's not changing. Let's find out some of the possible reasons.

This kind of situation is seen in all age groups but more prevalent in people above 35 years of age. The problems like past regrets, any kind of loss, stress, or anxiety accumulate and create confusion or a so-called middle-age crisis. In order to solve this, they jump for different solutions or different ways to come out of it. Some prefer to go with victim mentality where they stuck and surround themselves with failures, past regrets and refuse to move forward or don’t go beyond it because they don’t know how to come out of it. While others in order to forget their past regrets, failures overindulge in work and hard labor and get cut off from the world. And few stressed people sometimes in order to forget dissatisfaction, past failures or regrets they create distractions which are not healthy like some involved in drugs or unfortunately some even involve in extramarital activities to get rid of inner anxiety because for them running away become easier rather than facing those past or present realities and hence prefer to escape from the situation or so-called escape mechanism to chase satisfaction and peace. But in reality, these escape mechanisms again make them more stressed, because this makes them more confused and stuck. This kind of mentality and mechanism are the outcome of continuous stress and anxiety that the mind hold for so long.

Solving this problem sometimes seems impossible because in the brain the kind of information which is stored for so long makes a loop and hence brain keeps on thinking on the same pattern, every time when you face a situation or people. So, the situations become more difficult with time, but then every problem has a solution. Let’s find out. To change the mindset or habit on which the brain works can be changed with continuous practicing few good techniques. Then after a certain period, your mind will come out of those regret, stress, or anxiety. But then you need to change your present pattern on which you think and then take action.

1. Put an effort into a meaningful relationship:

Quality relationship is the key to success. Even if you are rich, having a good career, or great bank balance but if you don’t have genuine people around you to sustain a quality relationship then you won’t be happy. Put your effort into people if you want to be happy.

2. Understand your feelings.

Don’t ignore your inner feelings. Understand those feeling properly and clearly. Set the priority for the thoughts that creates those feeling inside you. Try to find out the repetitive nature of those feelings. This way you will be able to picture them clearly and thus will reach to root causes that create those feelings. Also keeping in mind that how it’s going to affect your people with whom you want to have a quality relationship in-home or office or in the workplace.

3. Observe the ripple effect of your emotions.

Have you ever observed you're emotional outburst and its effect on people who surround you? And next time if it happens then it needs to be handled in a better-controlled way. Deal with those outbursts in a better and healthier way rather than jumping or finding a way to throw frustration or discomfort on others.

4. Learn about your discomfort when it arises.

Must learn to live in those discomfort with better bearing but without holding any grudges, hatred, or sadness rather than making harsh decisions which again will put you in more agony in near future. Try to lean in your discomfort. This way you will be more calm and confident while confronting it in the future.

5. Feel your emotions physically.

Have emotional clarity.

It means that we have a good understanding of how we feel emotionally. This is a rare skill and people take years before they clearly understand it.

Label your emotions. Use plain language. The more fluent you are with real emotional language, the more clearly you will be in understanding it.

Clarify your emotions. Get used to the idea of emotional complexity. When we feel upset, we're not feeling one single emotion but a bunch of emotions which is releasing

Time your emotions. Emotions don’t actually last very long. If you feel upset emotionally, notice the dominant reason, how long it lasts.

6.Know who and/or what pushes your buttons

Be aware of the factors which aggravate the state of mind and results in emotion outburst. This way by getting aware of the environmental factors causing the situation can be avoided or can be kept in control in the future. This way you will be able to identify the elements and will keep them in check in near future.

7. keep a journal about your emotions

Always try to make records of different sets of emotions. When do these emotions occur? Why does it occur? This way you will be able to identify the elements that aggravate the state of mind and result in emotional outbursts. This way by getting aware of the environmental factors causing the situation can be avoided or can be kept in control in the future.

8.Healthy Boundaries/ under stress

If you cannot ignore people or situations that create stress or trigger your emotions then keeping distance and maintaining healthy and constructive discussions without stressing on personal opinions will save you from getting disturbed. You need to be aware from inside that the external behavior or pattern is just the reflection of others it's nothing to do with your internal happiness and peace. Bottom line is that if you are sure that your happiness is permanent and it lies inside then the outside situations are not going to deviate or distract you.

9.Find a way not to feel bad

By indulging in good, constructive or healthy activities like watching the movie for an instance but not switching over to weird or unhealthy distractions makes a day better. Here feeling good factors is something that should enlighten you. So not feeling bad is not just ignoring other's stupidity but indulging in better constructive meaningful activities. So that mind can be occupied by good, light thoughts.

STOP BEHAVING THE WAY YOU HAVE BEEN BEHAVING IN PAST AS IT LEADS OTHERS TO PLAY WITH YOUR PREDICTABLE BEHAVIOUR IN ADVANCE, SO CHANGE YOUR MIND, YOUR ACTION.